20 Puns That Will Make Your Day!

These are so bad that they are actually hilarious 😂

Vishal Mehta
3 min readMar 2, 2022


Photo of a statue with two heads — one smiling and other laughing.
Photo by Mark Daynes on Unsplash

If you’re like me, then you need a good laugh to start your day off right. What better way to do that than by reading some actually hilarious and really bad puns? I’ve collected 20 amazing ones for you here, so enjoy!

If you’re reading this, how about picking your best (I mean worst) of the lot and giving some love? (Thanks in advance)

  1. A few puns make me numb. But math puns make me number.
  2. Did you hear about the guy who invented the knock-knock joke? He won the Nobel Prize!
  3. Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium? Yeah, it was OK.
  4. What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator!
  5. How does Moses make coffee? Hebrews it!
  6. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. I can’t put it down.
  7. Why are ghosts such bad liars? Because they are easy to see through.
  8. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
  9. I tried to catch some fog, but I mist!
  10. Are you a vampire? ’Cause you suck!
  11. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was…two tired!
  12. I couldn’t quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.
  13. I was going to buy a book on phobias, but I was afraid it wouldn’t help me.
  14. Did you hear about that new restaurant called Karma? They serve nothing but revenge!
  15. You know what I saw today? Everything I looked at.
  16. How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it!
  17. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
  18. I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
  19. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
  20. I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.

Thanks for reading. If I accidentally hurt anyone’s feelings, I didn’t mean to — I was just being punny 😉.



Vishal Mehta

2x Top Writer • Dreamer with a third eye 📸 • I write about my observations, opinions, and experiences.